Little help? :/
Offline Okay--
I've successfully converted my boyfriend from being a christian into being an agnostic athiest, like myself. It took a lot of complicated explaining and rationalizing, but I got him there. The problem now is his parents' acceptance of his beliefs. A few days ago his mom started asking him about [i]my[/i] beliefs and what I am exactly (she already knew I wasn't christian, she just wanted a more in-depth explanation). When he told her that he was the same way, she got angry, and you can probably guess how it went from there.
My boyfriend is...new to this stuff. He doesn't have a firm grasp on everything yet, so it's harder for him to get his points across. Now I'm afraid he's made the situation worse. My suggestion was that all three of us sit down and talk about it, because I can help explain things better. I've done a lot more research, got my facts straight, yadda yadda. The situation with my own mother has improved since we last talked about it. I think I've gotten her to the point where, although she still disagrees, she accepts that I am what I am. But it was easier with her because well, she's my mom, and she'll love me no matter what. My boyfriend's mom, however...ehhh, it's definitely a more delicate situation.
I love him and it's important to me that his mom understands me, as well as her own son. He told her that I wanted to talk to her about it, and she has agreed that we could sometime soon. I'm confident in what I have to say because I've discussed it with a lot of friends, even converted a few along the way, and have had talks with my mom and dad. But...I'm still uneasy about it...not about what I'll say but about what she'll say, and what she'll think of me. I know I can stay calm about it, but whether she will or not, I don't know. I don't want to start a bitch fest. :[
Any advice on what I should specifically say or do?
Any advice period?
I think you should approach it with the intent of having her accept your thoughts as fine and moral, rather than actively trying to convert her. Phrase things in such a way so that it's clear that these are thoughts that you think are right for you, and nt necessarily her. She should know that you can have many of the morals that Christians say they strive for without Christian beliefs. Comparing yourself to a buddhist might be a help.
Obviously it's a huge plus if she abandons religion, but in this case, considering how much you care for your boyfriend, your relationship with him should be primary. Because of this I'd just make sure to remain extremely polite, patient, and pleasant. Avoid phrases like "you're wrong, the Earth isn't 6,000 year old" and instead say things like "there is a lot of good scientific research that can show the Earth is about 4.5 billion years old, would you want me to find some for you?"
I hope it goes well. :-)
[quote=Sapient]I think you should approach it with the intent of having her accept your thoughts as fine and moral, rather than actively trying to convert her. Phrase things in such a way so that it's clear that these are thoughts that you think are right for you, and nt necessarily her. She should know that you can have many of the morals that Christians say they strive for without Christian beliefs. Comparing yourself to a buddhist might be a help.
Obviously it's a huge plus if she abandons religion, but in this case, considering how much you care for your boyfriend, your relationship with him should be primary. Because of this I'd just make sure to remain extremely polite, patient, and pleasant. Avoid phrases like "you're wrong, the Earth isn't 6,000 year old" and instead say things like "there is a lot of good scientific research that can show the Earth is about 4.5 billion years old, would you want me to find some for you?"
I hope it goes well. :-)[/quote]
I agree with Sapient. Now is not the time to get into a intellectual pissing contest. Stay clam and above all hold the moral high ground. If you feel the discussion is spiraling out of control. Suggest that you continue at a later date. Good luck.